getting over lost love 

Now, the first thing to remember - love doesn't get lost. 


Love, unlike most things we are taught in school does not wither, crumble or break.  


Love is on a constant path of growth, sometimes exponentially and this will make you sometimes feel as if your heart would like to explode. 


It will not explode. It is expanding profoundly, moving every set of belief you ever had. It will move walls and ceilings and sometimes tear them open and down. 


Do not be afraid when that happens, walls need to be torn down, especially the ones in hearts. 


Translated this means that the moment you allow love to live inside you, you will have no choice but to grow. 


Love is the one thing that moves through space and time in erratic patterns.  


It is now sadly so that our human condition fools us into tying love to a certain space and time. It may be a person, or a memory, and in the worst of cases a set of belief. 


Love is so powerful, it stirs up all sorts of unsettling chemicals in our brain. It is so powerful, it overpowers us on a regular basis. 


And then, the fools we are, we blame love for actions we later regret. It may then be the right moment to take responsibility and grow in correlation with the love that resides inside. 


In the moment we have tied our love to a certain object bound to space and time we most likely forgot that we are only bound to two things: the possibility of growing love and the fact that we live in a river called out of your control.


Out of your control is everywhere. It will flush your insides out and will make you lose friends and objects, it will bring new things to you, it will sometimes let you stay afloat and sometimes make you feel as if you can't go on anymore. One thing the river will not be able to maintain are ties. Ties you made from your heart, where the love you grow resides, to other people or objects, or in the worst of cases a set of belief. 


The river, being the good river it is, is well aware of the transience of all that is not love or itself. It is bound to that knowledge. 


Sometimes we grow a tie so strong to a person, or a object, or in worst cases a set of belief, that we feel as if we are almost one. Maybe the lines in between those two people, or objects, or in worst of cases set of believes, become so blurry even others fail to distinguish. But they don't fool the river. 


The river doesn't do things on purpose, it is a flow, so don't blame it for things that happen to your dislike. 


And now, it happens ever so often or rarely that a bond so strong you would have thought lasted forever, snaps. It snaps and throws you into a whirl, it turns you, it loops you, it will make you go dizzy, fuzzy and scared. 


And because the flow doesn't go easy on people, you will be fighting for air, you will be shouting on top of your lungs, "why me" and this will leave with you with less oxygen, you will swallow tons of river because all you ever thought was real when you tied your love to someone else, or an object, or in worst of cases a set of belief, is gone, or at least not tied to you anymore. 


It is then when you feel incomplete, amputated, lost and scared. 


And will you believe me, most of us, have had to go through this once or several times. 


But you are not incomplete, amputated, or lost. 


You are still where you are, in a vast flow that will carry you to all sorts of wonderful things. 

The snapped tie did not mutilate you or amputate your love. 


It doesn't matter how long or short the tie, it is always kept highly strung. And now that it has snapped you may feel injured, but think of it like a rubber band that snapped when strung too extreme. 


A quick, sharp pain - it's gone. The rubber band is no more. 


Now with snapped ties it is very similar, only that we might think and sometimes feel as if the part our tie was attached to was ours. 


But nothing is ours but the love we carry and the uniqueness of the way we flow. 


Now remember the first thing, love doesn't get lost. 


But if you are right now in a moment in time and space, where your tie snapped so hard and you feel incomplete, amputated, lost and scared, remind yourself that the greatest thing is already there. 


Maybe your love that tied to a person, an object or in the worst of cases, a set of belief felt like something out of yourself, since you might have felt that your heart was about to explode. 


But it was growing inside you, and while doing that it replicated, multiplied and radiated into everything and everyone around you while being just as beautiful and magnificent inside you. 


Remember, you heart did not explode. 


You are still breathing, which means you are still among us in this wonderful river, and you came to here, to mend the pain that might make you feel like you're drowning. 


Now, remember no love gets lost. 


But once a tie snaps you need to be tidy. You can't leave those loose ends dangle around, where new and even bigger loves need to grow. They might get tangled up in snapped ties, stunt their growth, crook their path. 


Remember, this love might have torn some walls down, it might have lifted the ceiling and allowed you views you didn't know existed before. This is yours. The view, the torn walls, the ceilings higher than you ever imagined. They will not be taken away from you, they are yours. 


So now what you do, in order to allow all the small and bigger loves to grow, is to tidy up those snapped ties. Take the snapped ties and search a box for them. We will not throw away this love, because love doesn't get lost, it just changes its name, its tag, its label or its face. 


But as long as the sight of a snapped tie hurts you, you need to get this box and carefully fold this tie so it fits perfectly into the box. You will then notice that it is not the love that hurts, it was the tie. 


The love was always there, growing steady, explosively, beautifully and what snapped was the tie. 


Now, do not label the box with anything bitter or sad. Do not pack yourself into that box. Don't live around that box. Just put it somewhere, not too secret, but certainly not exposed. 


See? See how the love feels it can breathe again? That tie was bound to a person, or an object, or in the worst of cases a set of belief, but once it snapped and you boxed the tie, love appears in its original beautiful entity. 


Now, this advice is for the ones that feel their tie so harshly snapped it took their breath away. It is for the wounded lovers, the broken hearted, the childless mothers, the motherless children. It is for the waking dreamers, the sleepy walkers, the whispering sounds of stagnation. 


Your love was never and will never be lost. Your love is right there where it belongs, in the pulsing, vibrant centre of yourself, growing each second, each moment through time and space. All the love you have accumulated is there to hold up ever growing ceilings, ever crumbling walls, ever expanding horizons. 


And maybe you have a room full of boxes filled with dozens, maybe hundreds of ties. But they are just proof of your mesmerizing ability to grow this love. 


And when you feel a tie being strung, or about to snap, or you are sitting here with your hands holding your face because the snap was just too harsh, remember. 


You cannot lose what grows and radiates so wonderfully inside you. 

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Kommentare: 1
  • #1

    Best Hair (Donnerstag, 25 August 2016 10:08)

    Love the pictures and all the variety in this book.