vessel (is a poem)

I have been standing here for days and have still to decide which turn to take

But the faster I go the slower I will leave

as life is a bird on my back and death is just a grief

I am not scared of what you call tomorrow or eternity

as where I come from the stars are my parents and the moon my nurse

and they taught me time is just a vessel like a poem or a hearse.

A vessel to put memories and hope and visions in

But they will break and vanish as the vessel expands.

Because for their cause is no reason and my family says:

I should feel, rather than wish - and do, rather than pray.

I was born godless; my father never claimed paternity on me

And my parents told me that there is not one father

But millions of which each has a wisdom to share.

I was born homeless; my mother never gave birth to me

And the nurse told me that I crawled out of a womb myself;

With nothing to fear, as I was naked and bare.

I have been standing here for days because even if ran I won’t move

I have been living here for eternity and have died a few times before

But time is what we take when we move in uncountable measure

But I take what I need and will not call it a vessel.

I will need, rather than want -and conquer, rather than claim.

And my parents told even if we picked colours they’ll all look the same,

That white and black are just varieties of grey and only light’s to be blamed

My parents taught me that only nature’s law applies-

To birth and death and all that in-between for what we call “life”.

A life to put love and gratitude, apology and pardon in

But they will evanesce especially the love when we forget one of them

My parents showed me light and what it brings

The shadows, the colours, the reflection of my wings

My nurse taught me to cherish each one of these things

As they’re not mine, nor mine to be taken or turned into me

That I can feel them and conquer but surely not claim

That I might need them and use them for keeping my way.

I have been standing here for days and my decision is yet to be done

Got rid of pride and doubt, strengthened my bones and encouraged my tongue.

I have been standing here for days taken breath after breath after breath

Screaming at my parents, that I am here for life and one day for death

That I am ready to go in any direction or pace

That I am ready to leave these vessels behind

Use the tools I’ve been taught to bequeath a trace

And be like I wished for ages at last a free mind.